Whomp Whomp (Weigh in Wednesday)

Ahhh, weigh in day. I’m just going to get right out there with it.

Last Week: 232.3
Today: 239
Total GAINED:6.7lbs

Whomp whomp

This is kind of why I didn’t want to weigh myself. Dang it.

But to be completely frank, I can’t be too surprised. I’ve upped my water intake quite a bit, and I’ve been doing basic (easy) work outs, and I’ve been watching how much I’m eating and all that. Which should be a good indicator of “you’re gonna lose something.”

But come on, there is no other way to gain nearly 7 pounds in a week unless I’m eating an obscene amount. And even then, I’d have to eat some more. Don’t get me wrong, I gain weight fairly easy. I can look at a plate of nachos and my thighs explode.

But I’ve been doing a pretty good job. Sticking close to my calorie goals, moving and being active. So I’m chalking this up to either water weight or my body going “WHAT THE HECK, NICOLE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME!” My gut enjoys being larger than life. My thighs live to be jiggly and soft. Unfortunately for them, I don’t agree.

While the number definitely bothers me, I can’t put too much stock into it. Knowing all the good-for-me changes I’m making, I can’t be upset about the number. While I’d love to see the scale go down, I actually feel pretty great after the last week or so, excluding this cold that is lingering.

I’ve slept better, I’m not as groggy, I’ve only gotten two headaches this past week (compared to nearly daily) which is all awesome. Which I’ll bet it’s from not sitting around muching all day and being properly hydrated.

Of course I don’t feel 800% better than I usually do. It’s still enough of a change to notice it. And if I feel that much better after a week, then I know my body is responding positively to the change. Fat cells, not so much. Water weight, not so much.

So, I just need to push through. That doesn’t mean I’m going to cut even more calories or exercise all my food away because I’m “desperate” to lose weight. But I’m definitely going to wait this out, sticking with what I’ve been doing the last week, and see where that gets me.

I’m proud of getting back on the wagon, and eating better, and actually moving. I know I’m doing a good job, and I’m not going to let the darned scale get me down. #preach

How many of you have noticed a large gain after a fairly good week?

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Bad Blogger! Bad! Part 2

So, yesterday I left you at a cliff hanger. Am I really narcissitic enough to think that you out there are clinging on my every word, waiting desperately for another post from your favorite blogger like it’s crack (or swiss cake rolls, in my experience)? Anyone? Anyone?

Beuller?

Beuller?

No? Ok, maybe that’s just me.

Ahem, anyways. I said yesterday that something amazing, scary, life changing, (yada yada yada) happened. And I wasn’t being super overly dramatic, at least not this time. If you haven’t already guessed… here you go.

One month smiles

See that cute face right there?

We had a baby! Cue the fan fare!

Her name is Jordin, and she’s a firecracker! Her big brother loves her to the moon and back. And we’re super lucky. Super, super, lucky.

Whew.

So, now things are getting back on track, we’re feeling less stressed on the day to day. What isn’t getting back on track is my weight. Ohhhh, the weight.

I am a stress eater who was pregnant. So can you guess what happened? Yeah, I gained a crapton of weight.

Seriously.

Crapton.

Definition: Craptop. (crap-ton) Noun: Equal to four shitloads

When we found out I was pregnant I weighed 198. Considering I last left you at 194, gaining only 4 pounds in 6 months through all the stress we were under was remarkable for me.

What wasn’t remarkable how much I gained and how quickly. By the time I had Jordin I was 248. Yeah, I gained 50 pounds exactly. Before anyone starts screaming about how much a pregnant woman should gain…I know. My doctors advised me on it. And yes, I was 15 pounds over what a average weight pregnant lady should gain, let alone someone who is already overweight, But I got big!

Last day pregnant

See? And from the front, I looked even bigger. Yay!

But don’t be too alarmed, I’ve lost a little bit (with a catch). It hasn’t been my priority, but I did.

So for my new, official (practically starting over) weigh in.

In true Plumpville tradition…

Last Weigh-In (April 2014): 194.3
This Weigh-In: 232.3
Total gained: 38 lbs

And… quadruple ouch.

Now, going into the OR at 248 and now, nearly three months later sitting at 16 pounds lighter would be an awesome claim. But, alas, I’m not even going to pretend that I’ve lost 16 pounds. I’ve definitely lost something but let’s not get too excited.

Figure at least 8 of those pounds were all baby, and at LEAST 5 of that was all the stuff that comes along with giving birth, I won’t give details…all you moms and dads out there who know what exactly is entailed will know. Those of you who don’t, throw up a quick Google search, ask your parents, or think back to middle school health class.

So that really only leaves about 5 pounds. 3 pounds lost in 2 months. Can’t complain!

Wait.

Yes, I can.

Now lets consider retaining water, and boobs the size of Texas.

Yeah. So of all the fat I’ve lost (because let’s face it, the goal here is to lose fat… not non-fat weight)… nada. Zip. Zilch. Zero.

There is a reason why doctors advise only gaining a certain amount of weight… those are all health reasons. Safety for yourself and the baby being numbers one and two (not necessarily in that order).

For me, I’m glad I had a perfectly healthy, beautiful baby girl… but I realize now vanity is defintiely one of those.

I gained WEIGHT not baby and belly. My lovehandles expanded to respemble something akin to floating noodles, and my old favorite pair of pink skinny jeans barely button (and the seams…those poor, poor seams).

Let’t not even get started on my knees, back, and ankles. Quintuple ouch. Although that ouch is actual physical pain. Yeah. Not fun.

So here I am. Back, back, back on the wagon. I was cleared for exercise six weeks after my c-section, then some minor complications with BC (I’ll get on that at a later time) made the thoughts of situps or anything that would remotely force me to stretch and flex my lower stomach basically nauseating.

But I’m feeling better, physically ready and mentally sooooo ready. Whereas a few weeks ago, I wasn’t. Especially not physically.

So, this time around, I’m starting heavier than I was the first time I started this blog. I’m only 34 pounds down from my heaviest weight, and 50 pounds up from my lightest.

I’ve got a long way to go, and in the last couple days I’ve realized how difficult this is going to be again. But I’m determined.

So here goes nothing.

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Back on track.

Weigh In Day!

Well, the fateful weigh in day. Phew. I have been weighing myself weekly (granted, more than once a week) just to keep up to par on what I was weighing.

The last time I posted my weight was wayyyy back over a month ago.

So without further ado…

Last Weigh-In: 196.2
This Weigh-In: 194.3
Total lost: 1.9 lbs

So I’ve only lost 2 pounds in six weeks. Not that much, but on the flip side of the situation it hasn’t been an up and down kind of thing. There were several months that I must have lost a total of 20 pounds… but when that 20 pounds is bouncing between 180 and 200 repetitively, doesn’t exactly make for any kind of actual weight loss.

So even though I haven’t lost much at all, I’m proud of the fact that I haven’t been yo-yoing like I had been.

Perhaps that’s just me being overly optimistic, but I’ll take it.

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Belated Weigh-in Wednesday

Well hello there.

I’ve been MIA a bit these last couple of days (obviously). I blame it on a ton of late nights driving and general desire for sleep.

So of course I missed my first weigh-in day of this new start, not exactly a good move on my part. So we’ll call this Belated Weigh-in Wednesday?

I have checked my weight a while ago, and I’ve pretty much stayed stagnant for a little while, but now that I’m posting again, it’s time for an official weigh-in. So here you go.

Dun Dun Dunnnnnn

Last Weigh-In (March 27, 2013): 183.5
This Weigh-In: 196.2
Total gained 12.7 lbs

Well, there you have it. 12 pounds. Considering that it’s been nearly a year and having only gained 12 pounds, I can’t say that I’m too upset about it. Sure, I’m fairly bummed that I gained weight. But it definitely could have been worse.

There was zero exercise as far as going out and actually exercising, but that was kind of the story originally. And my eating habits weren’t all that hot. So when I stepped on the scale I was honestly expecting something more along the lines of 205+.

But I have enjoyed eating like crap to be perfectly honest. Eating whatever I wanted with minimal guilt was nice. But now I’ve got to get back to the roots.

Counting calories (take that “calorie counting nay sayers”)
Exercising (for real this time)
Blogging (more regularly than two posts then vanishing – oops)

But I’m hoping this time will be a bit easier, or at least different. I still have my family’s support and Josh’s support (two words: Nike Conversation) which haven’t changed. But this time around I have a few friends who are also on this path to losing weight. We’re all going about it in different ways. I believe there is Weight Watchers, Atkins, and eating better in the general paths… but it’ll be nice to be able to talk to people I personally know who are going through the same things that I am.

So we’ll see how it goes. Right?

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Self Control part two (Weigh-in Day)

Well, I watched a Jenna Marbles video called “Junk Food Confessions” and in between my giggling and “Oh my God, I totally do that!” I started thinking about what my inner fat girl forces me to do. Haha. For your entertainment I am going to post that video right here. Just for you, because I am so nice. Yeah.

I am definitely like that. We talked (ok, I talked…you all read) about my lack of self control the other day. And when my self control decides to wither away and die… I make all kinds of poor decisions. It’s not just “yeah, I guess I’ll eat my fifth cookie” it is wayyy more in depth than that.

No. My lack of self control makes me do some really ridiculous things.

At Subway… do I really need bacon on my Philly Cheesesteak Sandwhich? Nope… can’t really taste it… but I know it’s there. Will my stomach actually be able to hold that extra burger patty and large fries? Nope, but let’s upgrade anyways. Yup, potatoes make every meal better…. you know what makes potatoes better? Butter. Lots and lots of butter. Do my brownies really need chocolate chips in the batter? Nope. Add all the chocolate!

I get into this train of thought that… hey my self control already failed me, let’s just kill it and bury it and forget. Yeah.

I’m having some baked chicken for dinner… cool, a good decision for dinner. But you know what? That box of Velveeta Mac and Cheese looks absolutely divine. You know what would make that mac and cheese even better? Crumbled bacon (for texture…that’s the ONLY reason why…yeah right)…while we’re at it, let’s add more shredded cheese on top. Because my mac and cheese clearly isn’t cheesy enough.

Here is my favorite one. “I’m sooo full. My stomach is bursting. But it’s sooo good, I can’t stop!” I do that a lot with biscuits and gravy… also with pancakes. Well… also with cake.

I’m sighing heavily right now, just in case you are curious. I know it’s ridiculous, but I am powerless to stop it.

I’m not being dramatic. I am seriously powerless to stop it. It’s almost as though my mind is screaming at me to stop, but suddenly my brain isn’t connected to the rest of my body. My hands continue to shovel food in my mouth, my hands still drop half a pound of shredded cheese into my chili.

Yeah. That is why I have such a hard time losing weight. Haha.

I’m in the process of getting my self control under wraps. Way easier said than done. I’ve tried testing myself with small things. Kind of forcing myself to stop. I’ve had to mutter “Be good. Don’t over do it. You don’t need that much. You don’t need this again.” under my breath. It’s a hard thing to fix.

But I know that if I don’t fix it, I’m not doing myself any favors. Even if one day I find myself stepping on the scale and it says 145… I can easily visualize myself gaining weight back. Even if it isn’t a lot. Or I will spend the rest of my life jumping from 145 to 165 and back again.

It’s not that far off of a thought. I’ve been doing that for the last year or so. I’ve been bouncing between 185 and 200 constantly. And I blame my self control. If I had self control I would be consistently losing weight. I would be exercising regularly. I would be eating right consistently. Not yo-yoing. Fact of my life…

I honestly considered taking a pause from my weight loss path to focus on self control, but I’m worried if I stop that I won’t continue. The excuses will rear their ugly heads. Not only that but I need to develop my self control while I’m losing weight. (Well, attempting). Otherwise I’m not really teaching myself anything.

So…it’s going to be an interesting path. We’ll see what happens. Finger’s crossed I can get through this.

Really quick, I’ve got to do my weigh in day.

Last Weigh-In: 183.7
This Weigh-In: 183.5
Total Lost: .2 lbs

Am I going to count that? Probably not. But hey, at least it’s not a gain.